
I had been sold a lie about “Quiet Time.”
About a year ago, I remember telling my mentor, “I feel like a bad Christian.” It was over a breakfast of coffee and coconut yogurt, with my then 2-month-old wrapped snugly to my chest.
At that moment, my son was sleeping angelically, and I was able to breathe and finally process how I had been feeling about the transition to motherhood and one of the many changes that had come my way.
I asked my mentor, in her season of being a mother to young ones, how she found the rhythm for a good “quiet time”.
I found myself struggling with trying to meet previous expectations of what “time” with the Lord should look like.
Instead of having long periods of silent reflection and deep scripture focus, I found myself struggling to even have 5-10 minutes to myself, let alone the so-called Christianese “quiet time.”
“I feel like I’m neglecting God. I feel like a bad Christian,” I confessed to her.
She said something that changed my perspective completely:
“Your time with the Lord may look different than it did before, but in no way is it less effective. God does not cease to speak.”
Those words were freeing and changed the way I thought about living the Christian life.
Presence over perfection
I used to think a “good,” effective quiet time only looked like the picture of the perfectly curated quiet time of the ‘Christian girl’ that frequented my Instagram feed, often portrayed as the ideal.
This looked like an extended period of silence/prayer, uninterrupted bible reading, deep journaling, and perhaps a nice cup of tea to top it all off.
(Bonus points if you had worship music playing lightly in the background.)
While there is a beauty in that picture, I think somewhere along my Christian journey, I had been sold a lie about time with the Lord.
The Lie: It was supposed to be “quiet,” hence the name; it was isolated, and it only counted if it looked like the description above, complete with highlighter pens and diligent notes neatly transcribed into a decorative journal.
The problem became that I began to think that this perfectly curated “quiet” time was the only place I could meet with God, and hear His voice.
But some of the most powerful moments where I have encountered God have been in those wee hours of the morning, rocking a crying baby, while simultaneously crying out to the Lord for His strength and help.
I’ll tell you, those moments were far from quiet.
Sometimes my “quiet time” still looks like that nice, tranquil picture of focus and devotion, but most other times, a sleeping baby wakes up too soon, or a rambunctious toddler is toddling off to try to play with the dog’s water bowl again, and I race to stop him.
My quiet times often don’t look quiet anymore, but God’s Word is still living and active, and He never fails to meet me wherever I am.
As believers, our goal is for intimacy with Him, not perfection and adherence to rigid man-made expectations.
Jesus is still meeting me as I pray to Him while my arms are full, rocking and soothing a baby.
He is meeting me as I recite Psalm 23 and Psalm 91 over my son before I lay him down in his crib every night.
The Lord is there even when I am washing the dishes, thinking about how Good and faithful He has been.
Those moments of Bible reading and prayer are full of what we might call “interruptions”, but they are full of God’s presence, and His word is still speaking to my heart.
Every Moment an Invitation
After hearing some advice from other seasoned Christ-following mothers, I began to do what they did:
Leaving my Bible open at the kitchen table all day
This became a very helpful way for me to reframe reading scripture. Our open floor plan kitchen/living room area is the center of home life, so it was encouraging to have it always be open and available. It could be read in between those moments of meeting needs and serving the family.
It became always visible, always accessible, and there was less pressure if my reading time got interrupted, because I could always come back to it later.
My time with the Lord became more woven into every aspect of the day.
I also found that this became a way I was discipling my son. He could see me meeting with the Lord, reading scripture, and it became more visible to him, and something my son could be a part of too.
During daily breakfast, I now read aloud scriptures I have been studying to my son, who sits next to me in his high chair.
Some mornings he listens wide eyed, but most others he fusses and throws his scrambled eggs on the floor.
Then the dog comes to eat it up.
These moments are far from quiet, but perfection and silence aren’t the goal anymore.
In those precious moments of infant caretaking, which will soon be fleeting with each day my son grows up,
the Lord’s presence is always right there with me, and I always have the opportunity to meet with him.
Because God knows the season I am in, after all, He is the one who gifted me with my little one.
And instead of condemning me, He welcomes me and surrounds me with His Spirit.
Every moment becomes an invitation to commune with Him, instead of trying to fit it into one perfectly curated section of the day.
When I barely have time to put the baby down before I can eat, shower, or even use the bathroom, God is present in it all as I acknowledge Him in it.
When I ask for His help and strength,
when I face yet another sleepless night full of night wakings and midnight snuggles,
When I sing a soothing hymn while nursing,
He is present in it all.
God meets mothers in the midst of their motherhood.
He meets mothers in the quiet, lonely nights when it seems all the world is asleep except for you and your nursing little one.
He meets mothers in the joy-soaked summer days of sticky hands and toy-scattered living rooms.
He meets mothers in the busyness and beautiful chaos of raising and discipling littles.
I’ve laid perfection down at the altar, and my offering of surrendered, dish soap-soaked hands, and a tired but thankful heart is just as fragrant a worship as any other.
What areas of your Christian life or mothering are you perhaps feeling the pressure of perfection or man-made expectations?

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